Dream Too Little
Sometimes I dream too little. I sail too close to the shore when the Lord is asking me to set sail across the ocean. This was our reality a little over a year ago. I had plans; great plans. Plans that didn't include a move across the Atlantic to London.
But the Lord has a way of taking those plans and turning them upside down, inside out, all around.
We weren't planning on selling our home in Atlanta, crossing borders with our family of five; yet that's exactly what God had planned. And a year into our big move, I see that it is good; that He is good.
My husband received an offer to study theology under theologian and apologist Alister McGrath. What an amazing opportunity; how humbling! The only catch: we had to move to England. We fought about it, prayed about it, cried together about it, and knew without a doubt that this was what God was calling us to.
It's a New Year
2015 begins our second year in the English countryside, and there is so much that we have learned, experienced together as a family, it seems a shame not to share: how the Lord brought us across this frontier, landed us in this amazing medieval city of Oxford, and keeps astounding us with all His goodness. So, I thought a little blog about it all might help me chronicle the things I'm learning and experiencing as well as draw some of you in to the experience too.
I wrote the post Frontiers and Poetry right before our big move across the ocean. It details the struggle in my spirit as I wrestled with God over moving from all we knew and loved in Atlanta and finally realizing the truth that Yahweh would bring us into this new land.
For some, it may have been an easy decision to move; for me, there was security and comfort in the familiar. But The Lord gently chiseled away at my hard heart as I prayed to be united with my husband in the decision-making process.
We moved to London September 2013. We decided that though Tim was enrolled at King's College London, Oxford would be the ideal place to live. My post Fade Away describes the culture shock I experienced a month after moving to Oxford. It would seem England could not be all that different from the U.S. But, guess what? It is. And there were "things," comforts, I had to learn to live without.
I found that certain comforts had turned into treasures my heart trusted in. What you treasure, you trust. So, the only way to trust God, is to treasure Him, and to hold these "comforts" loosely.
It's been quite a journey. I'm learning to love the dreams He has for me; not the ones I have planned for myself. We snuck away to Paris for two days when my parent's visited, and Cappucinos and Crepes ponders how His glory surpasses even the magical city of lights. God asks for all; He beckons a faith with no limits. But He also gives all: Himself. And there is nothing more glorious than that.
Living the Lyrics
A.W. Tozer once said, "Faith is the gaze of a soul upon a saving God." I learned a lot in this move: how the Lord provides, goes before us, and gives Himself as the gift. Our journey didn't end with the move to Oxford. It's just beginning. There are still some rough waters I need to navigate, but I find that if My soul is fixed to a secure anchor then the ocean can be quite exhilarating.
A wise friend said, "Just think what the Lord will ask of your faith next." That thought might have scared me before, but now I'm kinda excited about it.
God asks for all on this journey with Him. He wants us to dream a dream bigger than our selves. To set sail across His ocean, riding waves of risk and wonder. Whether it's an international move, switching jobs, trying to keep our neck above the waters of raising children, He beckons us into this mystery of living His dream.
I love living in Oxford. But, really, I'm just trying to live the lyrics of the cross. Those nail-scarred hands provide more comfort than the hand of my earthly lover in mine as we stroll the Oxford streets at night.
There is a song that I hear in the melody of the splintered hands; it's a song we all can hear as we sail together through life. Let's live these lyrics together, because He is making a melody, sweeter than your wildest dream.